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Archive for the ‘film’ Category

12 Rock-themed Films that don’t suck

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Rock’n’Roll Movies That Don’t Suck!

* Hard Core Logo (1996) This poignant Canadian adaptation of Michael Turner’s novel follows a legendary (fictitious) Vancouver band on a reunion tour that involves, among other things: faking a benefit concert for someone who’s not dead, the schizophrenic bassists involuntary mid-tour lithium holiday and, uh, I think Joey Ramone is in there, too somewhere.

* Metal: A Headbanger’s Journey: Filmmaker/academic Sam Nunn combines his two loves in life (metal music and anthropology) in this documentary which views the evolution of heavy music from a cultural standpoint, featuring deluded groupies, appalling album art and Nordic black metal fans who might possibly be taking themselves a bit too seriously.

*Pink Floyd’s The Wall (1982) Yeah, sure; The Wall is more overwrought than any other film listed here. Is it melodramatic? Ohhh, yes! Pretentious? You bet your sweet ass! Still, in what other film could you see a scene like this: Read the rest of this entry »

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Written by Soylent Ape

May 27, 2008 at 10:57 am

9 movies that suck…

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9 movies that suck but you have to see them anyway because everyone else has and you’ll never know what people are talking about unless you suffer through them

1. Men in Black

Ever pull the wing off a fly? Care to see the fly get even?

Oh noes! There are aliens living among us, being all allegorical about race relations! Someone call the Mib Squad: The first, last, and only line of defense against the most ham-fisted metaphors in the universe!

2. Titanic
The unsinkable ship is sinking! Fortunately, I have a doctorate in applied physics and have spent years calculating the specific counter-intuitive actions that will save us from just such an event! (later…) Oh, sweet forced irony! I died anyway! Read the rest of this entry »

Written by The Bagel of Everything

March 24, 2008 at 12:10 am

Idle hands are best served cold

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Saturday, January 5th — Hayden, Idaho

Mr. Name Withheld, mid 20’s, sees the mark of the beast on his hand, wraps a tourniquet around his wrist, cuts it off with a circular saw, microwaves it (?!), then calls 911. Surprise: He’s now relaxing in a mental hospital.

“It had been somewhat cooked by the time the deputy arrived,” sheriff’s Capt. Ben Wolfinger said. “He put a tourniquet on his arm before, so he didn’t bleed to death. That kind of mental illness is just sad.”

That’s pretty much it.

Sources: KUTVSeattle TimesFox News

Somebody should totally make a movie about that. Oh, wait, they have!
Idle Hands: Putting the AWESOME in ‘awesomely bad’.
Srsly, I love this movie.

Written by The Bagel of Everything

January 15, 2008 at 11:05 am

Rest in Peace – In Advance: Audrey Tautou

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Rest in Peace

(in advance)


Audrey Tautou

Audrey Tautou

1978-2020

On November 4, a new series began here at RationReality, in which we celebrate the lives of our favorite celebrities by writing their about their eventual deaths. We do this to quiet the deep soul-stirring fear that we will be too busy to care on the day these Gods among men actually meet their end.  To this end, Soylent Ape brings us our second edition of Rest in Peace – In Advance.

Ration Reality PreBituary: Audrey Tautou (1978-2020)

Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Soylent Ape

December 14, 2007 at 5:12 am