Ration Reality

hyperbolic excellence

Ain’t that sweet!

with 19 comments

I was surfing the net for a birthday gift for The Nephew of Everything. I found this poster, instead. Awe! It’s very me, don’t you think? Naturally, I arted my reaction:

what, no butterflies?
I’m going to buy the poster and put the words on the matting.

 Related posts: Juanita the Wonton Bitch – Daddy says we is gunna be movie stars – Mr. Fluff Must Die 


Written by The Bagel of Everything

April 26, 2008 at 11:28 am

19 Responses

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  1. hmm?

    Don’t worry it’ll only hurt for a second.


    April 26, 2008 at 2:25 pm

  2. please be gentle.


    April 26, 2008 at 2:33 pm

  3. Was it cuz of the Lychee sauce ?


    April 26, 2008 at 2:47 pm

  4. I’ll recover.

    I’m fortunate there were no rainbows or butterflies. It would be like a WMD of cuteness.

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 26, 2008 at 4:33 pm

  5. Like a pussy cornucopia ?


    April 26, 2008 at 5:29 pm

  6. a pussy cornucopia OF DOOM!

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 26, 2008 at 5:51 pm

  7. There should be another poster that says…”Twenty seconds later” ……with lots of blood


    April 26, 2008 at 8:11 pm

  8. I can only vote once for soma? it won’t let me vote. what the fuck kind of contest is that?


    April 26, 2008 at 10:19 pm

  9. come on freddy, you could give it more then 20 seconds. I did.


    April 26, 2008 at 10:21 pm

  10. I know, right?! Stupid democracy!

    Don’t fret…voting ends soon.

    He says Sunday 8am, but I forget what timezone he be in.

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 27, 2008 at 7:11 am

  11. Horses of any sort are not known to get on with cats. Just an observation.

    Hey, where’s the rainbow? Anytime you depict a horse with wings, a horn, or both, there must be a rainbow. IT’S THE LAW! I have to report this to the FBI’s Mythical Creatures Depiction Task Force.

    Soylent Ape

    April 27, 2008 at 7:55 am

  12. What’s up with unicorns’ horns, anyway? Is it purely ornamental, or do they gore each other with them?


    April 28, 2008 at 5:51 am

  13. Depends what book you’re reading. Some of the gritter unicorn books (Yes, gritty fuckin’ unicorn books) have some pretty nasty uses for those horns. Disembowlments, dismemberments, impalements and various skewerings abound galore.

    Then there’s, y’know, the ‘magical, fairy, rainbow-pixie, feather-kitten puppy-dust’ shit.

    Check through any random swords and sorcery/fantasy type publisher. Forgotten Realms, Wizards of the Coast, TOR, Bellatine, Del Ray, etc.

    Oh, and that poster makes me want to drown the kitten, and turn the horse into a shit load of glue.


    April 28, 2008 at 9:29 am

  14. Horray for getting it!

    The only book I ever liked that had unicorns in it was The Burning City by Larry Niven.

    It’s an awesome read.

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 28, 2008 at 9:32 am

  15. Three seconds later, everyone discovers that unicorns are carnivores.


    April 28, 2008 at 7:39 pm

  16. I don’t trust horses as it is, let alone one with a fucking horn!


    April 29, 2008 at 8:15 am

  17. Silly Cody! Everyone knows unicorns are carnivores!

    Soy’s dog even hates horses.

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 29, 2008 at 1:39 pm

  18. Its the horny horses ya gotta watch out for.
    Anyone been to TJ ?

    Unicorns could of actually existed at one time, think about it.
    The horn on a Rhino is actually just a really big hair. And then we have these mutant rabbits called Jackelopes whos horns are actually diseased mutant bone growth.

    Maybe during Europes mythological period there were just a few of these kinds of mutations in horse or ponys that finally bred them selves out ?
    Does anyone give a fuck ?


    April 29, 2008 at 2:52 pm

  19. Rob Zombie is known for horrific CD & movie titles such as The Sinister Urge, Dragula, and House of 1,000 Corpses, but the most horrific is his CD Educated Horses.

    That’s my nightmare.

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