Ration Reality

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Real Life Superheroes: Tothian Strikes Back!

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STOP THE PRESSES!  The man, the mystery, the enigma, known as SUPERHERO has spoken!   

Here at Ration Reality, we take threats very seriously. Very seriously indeed. And all the moreso when the threats come from a superhero!

As a result of some of our recent posts, exposing the subculture of underwear perverts (these can be found HERE and HERE, and as always, thanks to contributor Hurricane Sluttina for writing the original piece), there’s been some bad blood between us at Ration Reality and the league known as the HEROES NETWORK. Sadly, after an honest attempt to open a dialogue with them, Bagel and I were both banned from their site.

This is the email that I received:

Bagel received a similar one, and it appears that Tothian would prefer to save the really harsh language for use on girls.

(note from bagel: I didn’t even post anything on the board! I just registered so I could see!)

Now, this brings up a couple questions. First off, who the fuck is Tothian and why is he threatening us? And second, this \\&.quot;Nostrum\\&.quot; that he’s threatening us with: who (or what) the fuck is that? I’m not entirely sure how to pronounce ‘\\&.quot;’ so I’m going to operate under the assumption that it’s a secret title known only to the true initiates amongst the ranks of the Real Life Superheroes, and in my fantasy world I’m pronouncing it ‘click-click-cha! quot-ski!’. Of course, altnernate theories may be be entertained as well, like the one that says that Tothian may simply be a tremendous fucking twat that doesn’t know how to format text in his email, and that he was actually attempting to write this: “Nostrum.” Even this is unclear, though … is “Nostrum” a quote? Or is it a person or a thing? Regardless, it doesn’t sound very scary: Nostrum simply means ours in Latin. (Tothian should perhaps have asked Zeitgeist for some help with his Latin!)



Our what?

But I digress.

I replied to Tothian:

And indeed I had! Upon registering at Heroes Network, I quite promptly posted a thread explaining that I was visiting them from Ration Reality, and that I was planning to write about them. This is mandated by the terms of service of their board. Tothian’s response was swift and vicious, but it did answer the question of ‘who the fuck is this twat that calls himself Tothian?’

Well now. President Tothian. I suppose I should have shown a little more respect to him. Actually, I suppose I should have shown a little more interest in him. Hell, any interest, since these emails were effectively the first contact that I’ve had with Tothian.

I guess the first thing to note here is that, well, I wouldn’t dream of making him look like a joke, especially since he’s copyrighted. I’d say he’s done a damned fine job of that all on his own. I’m willing to settle for just making him look sad and pathetic. (By the way, Mr. President Tothian, should you feel that I have not achieved the goal of ‘sad and pathetic,’ and have instead made you ‘look like a joke,’ then by all means, feel free to sue away. Here at Ration Reality, we pay a hefty retainer fee to the firm of Gowan, Foxsure, Self.So, Tothian, if you feel the need to communicate with our legal representation, feel free to contact them at (313) 263-2707. Just remember: Gowan, Foxsure, Self. Keep repeating that, until you’ve got it in your head. Gowan, Foxsure, Self.)I find it interesting that he said that people like me make his job more difficult. The mental picture I have built up of him through research and our conversation does not actually include a job. In fact, I’m going to go out on a limb here and make a wild guess that he’s probably unemployed and living in his mom’s basement. (Again, Mr. President Tothian, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, but … I’m pretty sure that I’m not.) look at the cute little fisties

On 24 April 2007, Columbia New Service did an article about Real Life Superheroes, and said this:

His uniform–he prefers that term to costume–is black combat boots, green cargo pants and a T-shirt. His logo, which is stitched into the middle of the T-shirt with cut-up bandanas, is made from the letters used to spell Tothian.

I can see why he’d prefer to call it a uniform, vice a costume. But really, if your cat had kittens in the oven, would you call them biscuits? Same principle applies here.  By the way, nice job on disguising the ‘secret origins of your name.’  It might have worked better if he’d included an ‘i-a-n’ in the insignia.

“That name chose me, I feel,” he said. “I am adding definition through the name, through my actions, my words and everything that I do.”

Through threats against everyone from blog authors to the President of Sudan!

Tothian says he doesn’t want to become a police officer because he doesn’t agree with every law on the book.

And also because not even the NYPD would hire someone with obvious psychiatric problems.

Tothian said he gets some strange looks when people find out he’s a superhero. But after people realize he’s out to protect them, he says their trepidation eases somewhat.

Because most of the time, retarded people are very sweet, kind people. They haven’t ever developed the capacity to be assholes.  Sadly, his path went elsewhere.

“Heroes are real, so superheroes are just heroes who are really super at it,” he said. “The world is constantly crying out in need of superheroes, and I’m giving them one.”

That’s right … he’s super! Thanks for asking!

Here’s what Wikispaces says about him:

Tothian is a Warrior, and a real-life Superhero, who primarily operates in the New Jersey & New York City areas, but focuses on operating internationally, with a heroic mission to save the world. Understanding his mission in life from a very early age, due to his heroic heart & mindset, he trained his mind, body, & spirit to become a warrior, through martial arts, meditation, military school, joining the U.S. Marine Corps Reserve at age 17 as an Infantryman, and by studying in the ways of the warrior, samurai, ninja, & hero. Tothian uses his training by patrolling his area on a semi-nightly basis, seeking to help, protect, and/or save others. He fights the necessary evils.

Really. A noble path. The United States Marine Corps is an honorable organization. I’ve been happy on numerous occasions for the presence of Uncle Sam’s Misguided Children onboard ships on which I’ve served. Other options – sheep, etc. – would simply have been too obvious.

What are these ‘necessary evils’ that he fights?  I mean, I consider pre-ground coffee to be a necessary evil.  Fresh ground is so much better.  Skim milk is a necessary evil.  Splenda is a necessary evil.  Hell, getting an oil change is a necessary evil.  Does the extent of his campaign against ‘the necessary evils’ extend to simply putting off getting an oil change?  (In his mom’s car, of course, not his own, since he doesn’t have one.)

But wait! There’s more!

Wikispaces continues:

He is also currently planning a mission to go to Darfur, Sudan. His plans include allying with the Sudan People’s Liberation Army to fight the Janjaweed Militia, and remove Sudan President Omar Al-Bashir from office, replacing him with a leading member of the Sudan People’s Liberation Movement.

So. Here’s my question then. What would the United States Marine Corps think about one of its reservists plotting the overthrow of a legitimate foreign government? That might possibly be covered under Article 94 of the UCMJ.  If I remember correctly (and I do) there’s some neat verbage in there about ‘death or such other punishment as a court-martial may direct.’

Of course, this might not even be an issue anymore, if he’s not subject to the UCMJ at all. If, for instance, he’d been kicked out of the Marines for being, well, fucking nuts. Now, I’m not saying that he actually did get a psych discharge, just saying that for his sake, it might have been a lucky break if he had been kicked out of the Marines for being a completely batshit crazy fucker, so he could avoid a firing squad. Of course, since the United States doesn’t have diplomatic relations with the Sudan, this might not even be an issue.

Moving on, I investigated further into his claims to be planning a mission to Darfur, and I found THIS. It’s pretty self-evident that this is simply a ploy to rectify the nasty virginity problem that’s been plaguing Tothian. (Sadly, since he was probably psyched out of the Marines, he never even got a chance to have his cherry busted out at sea by some burly bos’n’s mate that likes ’em young and weak.) Unsurprisingly, it appears that hot chicks like it when men care about their causes. It never occurs to them that we only care up until the point where it allows us into their panties. Of course, in Tothian’s case, he’ll never have the opportunity to drop his pretenses after getting in their panties.

The nasty virginity problem has been attested to by none other than Squeegeeman, and practically confessed to by Tothian himself, in Time Out – New York.

But the romantic returns of being a masked savior have been disappointing. “I’ve only had one girlfriend in my life,” admits Tothian. “Yeah,” snorts Squeegee Man. “And her name was Lady Invisible.”

I think that says it all, folks.


It’s people like you, Mr. President Tothian, that make me question my opposition to abortion. It’s people like you.

Here at Ration Reality, we like to have an impartial scorekeeper. I believe that Albert Einstein will serve the purpose admirably.



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84 Responses

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  1. My persona’s copyrighted, also.

    And I’m going to use it to call Tothian a pussy.

    In case he feels like responding and playing the Marine card, visiting Marine basic and thinking about showing up for drills once a month doesn’t count for shit.


    July 5, 2007 at 11:41 am

  2. I knew that kid in high school. He’s got what we call “douche’s disease”. DD is very serious and can only be treated by a serious of intense, bag-related treatments.

    Gimme a fucking break.


    July 5, 2007 at 11:59 am

  3. I hereby officially open this meeting of the Super Villains Super Organization Against Super Heroes and All Things In Super Primary Color Super Spandex. (SVOASHATISPCSS for short).

    I am henceforth to be known as Vanillain, the Vanilla Villain. I am bent on world domination by only the most conservative and mundane means.
    Ya’ll with me?

    bagel of everything

    July 5, 2007 at 12:10 pm

  4. Sign me up!

    I shall be known as:


    Jesse Custer

    July 5, 2007 at 12:16 pm

  5. “Tothian is a Warrior, and a real-life Superhero, who primarily operates in the New Jersey & New York City areas…Tothian uses his training by patrolling his area on a semi-nightly basis, seeking to help, protect, and/or save others. He fights the necessary evils.”

    Sure he’s doing a great job protecting the “citizens” of Little Silver, NJ and all of those “areas”…cause you know crime there is at an all time high right now.

    “oooh…officer…these really mean boys are smoking pot. Arrest them at once!”

    Let’s see him bring his fairycapedass to Harlem at midnight…or how bout East New York…if I wore a cape like that or was a snitch in the neighborhood where I grew up in Brooklyn you know what would happen to me? I’d be puking shit worse than Kobayashi was yesterday. Have either of you been in a street fight? Gotten slashed by a box cutter? Thrown a meaningful punch? No cape or superhero status will protect you then.

    Seriously though…I know some of these guys (SuperHeroes) are out to promote the greater good…and I respect that, I really do. But sometimes you just need to realize the approach you’re taking. You don’t need a cape, a mask and a gimmick to make a difference. Trust me. Be like Superhero and get involved with your local police departments, join/organize neighborhood watches. Start your own watch. The gimmicks? Not necessary. You’re just bringing yourself needless ridicule by squeezing your 140 pound bodies into spandex and giving yourself ridiculous names like SqueegeeMan. You’re just asking for ridicule and humiliation, and by golly…you’ve found it!


    July 5, 2007 at 1:17 pm

  6. Now, now. Squeegeeman does some good work, Chris. He just looks a little goofy while he does it.

    We at RR actually have a great deal of respect for Squeegee and his ‘squeegeeriffic’ mission. However, we also have a lot of lols at his ‘squeegeeriffic’ costume.

    Tothian, though. We think he’s a total fucking twat, as I believe I mentioned several times above.

    Jesse Custer

    July 5, 2007 at 1:22 pm

  7. I’ll be one of his arch-nemesis, Rainbow Roxas!

    …in all seriousness though, what the hell is this guy on?


    July 5, 2007 at 2:09 pm

  8. it actually turns out that he’s high on Jesus!

    We’ll have more on that later …

    Jesse Custer

    July 5, 2007 at 2:11 pm

  9. contact me or are you afraid .i promise i only destroy legitimate evil.

    master legend

    July 5, 2007 at 3:13 pm

  10. Am I actually supposed to buy that this guy was a Marine? ROFLMAO.

    I knew some guys like this once- but they had guns (really scary). Let’s hope this idiot doesn’t own anything more dangerous than a slingshot.

    Sydney Winchester

    July 5, 2007 at 3:15 pm

  11. Don’t agree with nor do I condone Tothian’s actions. Always preaches free speech, then contradicts such in this one action.

    Have nothing bad to say about your entries. A lot of people who claim to be “Superheroes” are just jokes. Personally hate the word “Superhero,” just the word, not the actual man.

    Regardless, when someone videotapes their heroic “Fast-food-for-the-homeless” campaign and posts it on the web, they are proving themselves to be the jokes you perceive them to be, just like the ones who make mock-videos and wield squeegees and claim to have insect-like powers or powers granted to them by a “Voodoo Queen.”

    Point is, you wouldn’t say what you have if they took this seriously.

    Have no beef with you. Tothian was wrong and just wanted to let you know that.

    For your reference:

    Nostrum (NASH-trum): a scheme, theory, device, etc., esp. one to remedy social or political ills; panacea.


    July 5, 2007 at 3:26 pm

  12. Thanks for stopping by, Nostrum!

    Just out of curiosity, did I pronounce your secret title correctly? ‘click-click-cha! quot-ski!’ ?

    Also, Answers.com says this:

    1. A medicine whose effectiveness is unproved and whose ingredients are usually secret; a quack remedy.

    2. A favorite but usually ineffective remedy for problems or evils.


    Jesse Custer

    July 5, 2007 at 3:31 pm

    • Tothian is no longer the “president” of heroesnetwork, as that “title” now belongs 2 Zimmer. But if you ask me, Tothian, Zimmer and Nostrum are all wanna-be heroes. I really do hate saying that but that is the way I feel, as they have given me reason to believe that is all they are. Its pretty sad. I’m not the only one who feels this way as some of my other fellow rlsh’s feel the same way.

      Asthma Warrior

      March 3, 2010 at 6:53 pm

  13. Thank you Nastrum, for your response. I’m actually kind of afraid. I mean, this Tothian guy seems…unbalanced.

    Do I need to inform the police or anything? This shit has gone way too far! I never ever did anything to the guy, never even heard of him. I registered at his forum, and didn’t say one peep, and he starts sending me threatening emails.

    bagel of everything

    July 5, 2007 at 3:43 pm

  14. Custer –

    Both could apply.

    1. First of my kind in my area. Effectiveness is still unproven.
    2. Problems and evil will always be around. Just do what I can.

    Pronounce it or mock me however you wish. You have the right, regardless of how I feel about it.

    Bagel –

    Tempermental. Don’t worry about it. Nothing’s going to come of it.


    July 5, 2007 at 3:52 pm

  15. Wow, Nosrtum actually came here & posted something. Just wow. He agreed with me too. More wow.


    July 5, 2007 at 4:08 pm

  16. Well, I consider my persona pretty open-source, so I’m gonna share it to call this guy a fuckwit – in the most clinical, technical, precise sense, of course . . . .

  17. @Nostrum: Thanks for coming by, seriously. I’m glad to know there are so many of you good guys out there, and not just the scary freaks.

    Speaking of good guys: Where is our Squeegeefriend? He’s awesome!

    @Superhero: Is Nostrum like a big deal or something? A hero’s hero? Think he’d mind if I called him Nossie?

    @FFE: Join the darkside! You can be Spamanator! You can a can of fried spam in a single sitting!

    bagel of everything

    July 5, 2007 at 7:07 pm

  18. WoW! what the hell did i miss?!?
    that dude tothian is a TOOL!
    what should my supervillian name be?…hmmm…
    you guys rock the dark side! peace.Stona.

  19. Yeah, Nostrum’s the man. Like a surgeon or something.


    July 5, 2007 at 9:08 pm

  20. Yeah, Nossie is out. I occasionally call him nos, but only in a hurry.


    July 5, 2007 at 11:15 pm

  21. Yeah, Nostrum’s the man…. because he writes a blog on MySpace chronicling his supposed nightly crime fighting patrols. Do you people believe everything you read? Because, honestly, there is no proof of anything he says, and amazingly enough people sometimes lie on the internet. I hate to break it to you. A masked vigilante roaming the streets of New Orleans would get at least some local media attention considering all of the witnesses he claims in his blog have seen him in action. But strangely, not even a small local paper has done a fluff story about even the rumor of this guy.

    So yeah. If you idolize him so much, just make up your own crime fighting stories and post them to your own MySpace blog.


    July 6, 2007 at 7:01 pm

  22. I don’t make up poop. Why would I need to? all I do is feed Cops & Bums. And inspire people to help other people. And the news does cover it. looky here:

    The point though? U give people the benefit of the doubt. Until somebody exposes nostrum, or proves otherwise, I believe him. He’s made it clear he doesn’t like my “goofy” style, I still believe him. Prove him wrong, I’ll say ‘you were right & I was wrong” but not until then.


    July 6, 2007 at 7:27 pm

  23. Exactly my point, the news covered you of all people, and all you do is feed cops and bums in a silly outfit. If some guy was actually living the superhero lifestyle and doing all the things he claims to do in that blog of his, there’d be a story of a different kind, rumors of vigilante justice on the streets of New Orleans. People are eager for this kind of story, especially in New Orleans these days. That might make national headlines.

    You shouldn’t give people the benefit of the doubt when their claims are so fantastically improbable. Not unless you are extremely gullible anyway. Innocent until proven guilty is only a truism in legal proceedings. In most other cases, a little more proof is required. And this one doesn’t pass the common sense test.

    I have far more respect for people like Squeegeeman, who at least seems to know that he’s making an ass out of himself, and does so willingly to put a spotlight on various causes. I think there’s probably a lot better ways to do it, but I at least respect that he doesn’t pretend to be some masked vigilante roaming the streets like a half-assed Punisher.

    Speaking of respect, I have even less respect for Tothian. Here’s kis comment on Nostrum’s MySpace page:

    “Hey Nostrum,

    I take it we’re gonna hear about your insane patrols for the past month, in a couple of days. I look forward to it. I can’t wait until the day where you post a blog about a patrol where you kill a man. I know it’s coming, I just fucking know it. You’re gonna start killing people. LOL.

    In Freedom,

    Yeah…. Killing people is funny, isn’t it Tothian? Nice superhero. A role model.


    July 6, 2007 at 11:01 pm

  24. “If some guy was actually living the superhero lifestyle and doing all the things he claims to do in that blog of his, there’d be a story of a different kind, rumors of vigilante justice on the streets of New Orleans. People are eager for this kind of story, especially in New Orleans these days. That might make national headlines.”

    “Yeah…. Killing people is funny, isn’t it Tothian? Nice superhero. A role model.”

    So you want people to take the law into their own hands or not?

    Captain Prospect

    July 7, 2007 at 12:47 am

  25. Prospect: I personally am in favor of people following the law, whenever possible.

    When and where the laws allow me to carry a weapon either concealed or openly, I do so. Works a treat for me – people tend to try very hard to look away when they see I’ve got a cocked-and-locked 1911 on my hip, and I’m mostly an antisocial fuck anyway.

    When and where the laws allow me the means to defend myself, I’ll have those means close at hand. I’m not going to ask anyone else to do for me what I’m not willing to do for myself.

    Jesse Custer

    July 7, 2007 at 1:16 am

  26. I’m not advocating the vigilante justice, I am just saying the media would have picked up on it by now, given all the witnesses mentioned in the blog. Whether it’s a good or bad thing, people would take notice.


    July 7, 2007 at 1:48 am

  27. No, Glen, I got that. I simply think that Prospect was advocating that.

    It’s for certain that Tothian was, in another post.

    But then, he’s batshit crazy.


    “I have always believed that I was meant to face the Antichrist in martial combat. If I’m wrong, I’m wrong. If I’m right, then I save the world. Certain prophecies have coincedentially proved what I have always felt, to possibly be a truth that comes to happen. Believe in me.”[/quote]

    About the only way to get more wacky than that is to dress like a clown and start hiding in the sewers, telling kids about balloons and things that are all floaty and shit.

    Jesse Custer

    July 7, 2007 at 2:05 am

  28. Wow…. he better hope the antichrist isn’t packing a gun.


    July 7, 2007 at 2:20 am

  29. Oh, you’ve met sewer clown! he’s a great Guy! (Just kidding) But a guy like that would be safer to be around. Now you know why I pulled my support for heroes network.


    July 7, 2007 at 2:48 pm

  30. Superhero: I’m sorry for your loss of a social network, but am glad to hear you are man enough to stand up for your beliefs. Of all of them, you seem like the only one worthy of being called a Hero.


    bagel of everything

    July 7, 2007 at 4:29 pm

  31. Welll, I met a family, on the beach last month while filming for some half hour documentary on me that’s being shown in canada on TVtropolis. A dad Mom, & little boy. The dad had just come back from his second tour in Iraq. I told the little boy “I have the capr, but your dad is the hero”. that’s where I prefer the term to be used. I’m just a guy trying to put a dent in things.


    July 7, 2007 at 5:25 pm

  32. I don’t wear a turban, and I’ve met Tothian.

    Be careful.

    ~The Cap’n.

    Capt. Obvious

    July 8, 2007 at 12:22 am

  33. Sorry about that Cap’n … in the pictures, it looked like a turban. Squeegee has informed us, however, that it’s actually a special police-style hat …

    There’s a variety of reasons that I’m not really worried about Tothian. Namely, I’m on the opposite side of the country from him, and since I’m pretty sure he’s both unemployed AND probably unemployable … it’ll take him a while to panhandle enough for even a Greyhound ticket to come and find me. :)

    But, thanks!

    Jesse Custer

    July 8, 2007 at 1:10 am

  34. Makes you wonder how he’ll get to the Sudan, doesn’t it?

    Soylent Ape

    July 8, 2007 at 1:42 am

  35. Well, he does also list Osama bin Laden as an arch enemy …

    IF, and that’s a really big IF in capital friggin’ letters, he’s still in the Marine Corps Reserves, all he has to do is call up his unit commander and say ‘hey, I’d like to volunteer for a trip to the sandbox.’ He does that and hey presto! He’s got an all expenses paid trip, and he’ll even get paid in tax-free money.

    But that’s IF he’s still in the Marines.


    Jesse Custer

    July 8, 2007 at 1:56 am

  36. Jesse, have you refreshed his page? I’m betting OBL is now below you on his arch enemy list :)

    bagel of everything

    July 8, 2007 at 11:50 am

  37. I’ve got a better idea for a superhero Spam motif – I’ll just wear a large blue-and-orange yellow-striped beak and call myself ‘Bluecan’ – get it?

  38. […] all the controversy attached to our earlier articles (found HERE, HERE, and HERE), there’s been some agitation from the Real Life Superhero community about how they’re […]

  39. yeah, except on my nose.

    Hate to think where that guy’s keeping the can key . . . . .

  40. When I get out of med school, I wonder if I could start wearing capes and stuff while I operate on people. Would I be a superhero then?

    “You saved my life!”

    “I’m just doing my job!”

    (dun dun tsh)


    July 10, 2007 at 9:38 pm

  41. New post here:
    The World Needs Heroes

    bagel of everything

    July 12, 2007 at 4:55 pm

  42. […] Retards. Throw them in with the fat people, they make me very […]

  43. […] For more pissed off fucktards, see: Real Life Superheroes: Tothian Strikes Back! […]

  44. Sometimes, a ping is worth a thousand words.

    bagel of everything

    July 27, 2007 at 7:55 am

  45. […] note: Tothian, you might like to learn some lessons from the mistakes that these idiots made. It might help you […]

  46. *headdesk*

    Where the FUCK have I been?

    I wanna be a superhero toooooooo…


    July 28, 2007 at 1:21 am

  47. Hola faretaste


    July 29, 2007 at 11:04 am

  48. My friend, I think you meant to leave your threats here:
    Public Service Announcement: Help Fuck Over The Taliban

    (thanks to The Dragon Tail for clearing it up for me)

    bagel of everything

    July 29, 2007 at 11:20 am

  49. Hahahahahahah

    Bagel, our moron friend here is from Wisconsin.

    Do you think he might be one of the corpsefuckers ? Or do you think that maybe he’s just pissy about how his great (and fat) state was portrayed?

    Ah, well.

    Come get some, Abdul. Come and fucking get some.


    July 29, 2007 at 11:40 am

  50. I’m thinking he wasnt some attention for his cute little jihad, and saw the first part of this post:

    “Here at Ration Reality, we take threats very seriously. Very seriously indeed”

    bagel of everything

    July 29, 2007 at 12:16 pm

  51. Bagel, Thank you for your comment at The Dragon Tail How do we define terrorist? One who commits the deed of physical destruction or one who participates in threatening others? (and in this case, on a mass scale) I wonder if terrorists have different roles, maybe as an agent of warning first, then maybe as terrorist headquarters cleanup boy, then maybe a real assignment that gets him on a plane to another country to blend into their population before finding his target, strapping on a bomb, then blowing the living crappola out of himself and anything/anyone near him.

    Here is the official meaning:

    Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) – Cite This Source
    ter·ror·ism /ˈtɛrəˌrɪzəm/ [ter-uh-riz-uhm] –noun
    1. the use of violence and threats to intimidate or coerce, esp. for political purposes.
    2. the state of fear and submission produced by terrorism or terrorization.
    3. a terroristic method of governing or of resisting a government.
    [Origin: 1785–95; terror + -ism]
    Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
    Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

    American Heritage Dictionary – Cite This Source
    ter·ror·ism (těr’ə-rĭz’əm)
    n. The unlawful use or threatened use of force or violence by a person or an organized group against people or property with the intention of intimidating or coercing societies or governments, often for ideological or political reasons.

    The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
    Copyright © 2006 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
    Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.


    July 29, 2007 at 12:21 pm

  52. Interesting article!
    Where can I find more on this theme?


    August 6, 2007 at 3:10 pm

  53. […] of it. Anyway, names have been changed to protect the innocent. As for the guilty (or at least the retarded), well, fuck […]

  54. […] love to make fun of this, but it’s like Tothian write it or something: it makes fun of […]

  55. I don’t think this was posted in the comments yet…

    Not that I don’t think Tothian is a crazy motherfucker. =\


    August 15, 2007 at 8:44 pm

  56. Perhaps … but you have to REALLY look for the ‘i-a-n.’ And since there’s plenty of material on the net that refers to him as ‘Eric Toth,’ I’m not really … y’know … concerned about it. :P


    August 15, 2007 at 8:46 pm

  57. Here is where the little stooge is spewing his latest venom when he’s not on his let’s pretend RPG crap site. http://geekswithblogs.net/mschmidt/archive/2004/05/12/4803.aspx Like any real vigilante hero would actually risk self-incrimination by posting on open boards. But he unwittingly does a service to folks actually trying to make a difference. He is such a total laughing stock and publicity whore that no one will take him or the idea of a real world super hero seriously. Human nature being what it is you only prepare a defense against what you consider a credible threat. So when the real deal does come along it will be a big surprise to the bad guys. I say this under the supposition that no idea is so out there that 1 or more aren’t nuts enough to give it a try. Eventually 1 or more will succeed and the world will become a more interesting place.


    October 11, 2007 at 1:22 am

  58. Sorry, Goldeneye…our automatic spam filter caught your comment. Glad I was able to recover it, as the link is of most excellence!

    “9/5/2007 5:25 PM Tothian – I should also add that Chris Guardian is my real real life superhero. When I need advice, I look to him for support. He is the reason I changed from being a Jedi to a superhero. Him and Superhero are the best ever.”

    I have to agree with him, tho. Superhero is awesome. Don’t really know Guardian much tho.

    bagel of everything

    October 11, 2007 at 9:59 am

  59. Thanks for the save Bagel. You think he will ever become sane enough to fess up that it’s all self promoting RPG BS on his part.


    October 11, 2007 at 1:10 pm

  60. If you guys want the real scoop, moreso than the obvious stuff above on both Master Legend and Tothian, go here: rlsmagazine.bravehost.com

    Two days ago, I wrote a blog on Myspace exposing those two frauds for the fucks that they are, and they bitched and moaned to their mommies and the Myspace admins deleted it… which just pissed me off. So, I reposted the damn thing on Bravehost. Enjoy!

  61. lulz
    I forget if I like Master Legend or not (I think in the end we decided he’s alright), but Tothian really itches my cooter. Love the diagnosis.
    has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person
    The superhero job is cut out for him!

    shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity
    I’m not so sure that one fits him. He certainly wasn’t detached from our articles about him.

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 15, 2008 at 3:40 am

  62. Somebody else already posted the RLS article about Tothian and Master Legend. But here it is again…rlsmagazine.bravehost.com

    And Tothian IS detached from a little thing you and I like to call “reality”. We sould glorigy him though- after all, he IS the greatest of all heroes!

    Battle Nun

    April 16, 2008 at 2:10 pm

  63. Um, yeah battle nun… look a couple of comments up.

    This particular article is nearly a year old.

    The Bagel of Everything

    April 16, 2008 at 2:34 pm

  64. …wow… arguing on the Internet is like the Fucking Special Olympics…

    …There’s no point to.. and at the end of the day… nobody gives a shit.



    May 8, 2008 at 1:20 am

  65. Dreizehn: I’m not entirely sure that’s how the saying goes.

  66. I would just like to add that no one Real-Life Superhero speaks for all of us. We’re diverse individuals with various goals, beliefs and methods.

    Of course, we’re curious that you might want to discuss this. Some of us try to keep a low profile (like Nostrum), while some of us have experimented with the other direction.

    In another thread, I thought that Entomo raised an excellent point that you should try to understand the movement. There are a lot of misconceptions and I would encourage you to look at it with a different set of eyes than Internet cynicism and smarminess.

    It was interesting that Nostrum put in a rare appearance and whether you know it or not, you should feel honored. He is a hero among heroes. It’s not an easy thing to have protected post-Katrina New Orleans from lawlessness. Please mock sparingly. You don’t really know what we’ve each done or accomplished. And we’re not bragging about it.

    But about this entire dialogue… Yeah, Dreizehn is right. At the end of the day…


    July 29, 2008 at 1:02 am

    • I find this very interesting. Would you mind telling me a little more about both Nostrum and yourself? Thanks
      email: tinytimm101@yahoo.com


      November 3, 2009 at 1:31 am

  67. You know, I never see superheroes argue in public. This behind the scenes stuff is quite a surprise.

    But those of you who do go out and make a difference (for the better), thanks for what you do, and be safe.

    I just interviewed two firefighters today (I’m supposed to be a photographer, but I make my living as a photo journalist so I have to do interviews sometimes) and when I left, I said “…and thanks for what you do.”

    Then I felt like a dork, because that’s something a nine year old would say. But I meant it. I’ve photographed these guys’ department out in below zero conditions at an empty summer camp fighting a fire with no place to get warm. They were out there for hours, and I never heard one complaint.

    I saw the guy with the SH on his costume; he’s a big guy! I actually clicked on the site to find out what SH meant. Is SH for Shaved Head? At first, I thought it might be the guys initials, or a joke, like Sh*t Head. That wouldn’t be heroic at all. (I’m trying to be good-naturedly smart alecky. Please don’t squat thrust my 5′ 5″ body into a ceiling…)

    It’s actually Super Hero. Kind of generic, but better than Tothian. I have nothing against him, but how about, I don’t know, “The Jersey Commando” or better yet, “The Jersey Jarhead.”

    This other guy in Jersey, btw, maybe so many people have logged onto his site to bust his b*lls (wait, that looks like it could be bills. I want it to mean balls. Who would want to bust someone’s bills? Balls. Wait, can I say balls?) that he just assumed you were there to harrass him. It sounds like he flipped out a little. Maybe he has issues combined with being tormented by actual Marines combined with a misunderstanding. Maybe a third party who is not involved (another superhero) can get a conversation going.

    As people who are trying to make the world a better place, that, though difficult, would be a good thing to attempt.

    Former U.S. Army (signal corps), former Guardian Angel (Boston, so not too dangerous), current Red Cross disaster volunteer (can you believe before shelter training, we had to get criminal background checks!).

    Does "Name (required)" mean I have to have a name in order to post here? Or that I must put something in this space?

    February 7, 2009 at 2:34 am

  68. I think Tothian is a pretty cool guy. I think whoever wrote this article isn’t telling the whole story. I think that what he is doing is a good thing.


    November 3, 2009 at 1:20 am

  69. I just saw this fellow on the Watchman DVD special features. I must admit, I was struck by his minuscule physique, soft appearance, and penchant for glaring at the camera. No doubt he thought the look was “piercing”. It wasn’t.

    In one cut he and his companion, Eliptico I think the name was, were running off to do something, I dunno, heroic maybe, but there was an elevated train in the background and I couldn’t help thinking “Damn! There goes my train! Mom is gonna kill me!” – Eliptico had a decent looking costume. but he might need to wait until he get’s that retainer out of his mouth before shouting “Stop in the Name of the Law!”

    This is a big-time movie that those two are now immortalized with, and I have to say I found it laughable. And now, having searched the net a bit, I get more glimpses into this guy’s existence, pages like this one, and I don’t know if I should keep laughing or be moved to outrageous pity.

    Then, at the same time I hear, in the back of my head, Depp’s line from Pirates of the Caribbean. “Yes, but you have heard of me…” and I want to cry.


    February 3, 2010 at 3:35 pm

  70. I actually am a RLSH
    the problem with Tothian
    is he thinks he’s going to save the world

    He’s also a dick, but you knew that.

    It’s one thing to put on a suit and help out with charity
    There’s a fine young man called “Treesong” does just that

    but if you think you’re going to be out fighting crime
    like little Eric there… well we see where that got him

    and yes I saw that scene with him running
    I would say he runs like a girl, but aside from being kinda sexist. That really would be an insult to girls everywhere


    February 3, 2010 at 6:52 pm

  71. Leave Jockos friend Tothian alone. he is a lovely man

    jocko jackamone

    February 23, 2010 at 3:14 pm

    • Jocko…Shut the fuck up


      March 8, 2010 at 5:26 pm

  72. make your move gay bobby. you are tothians bitchboy

    jocko jackamone

    March 9, 2010 at 10:45 am

  73. It would seem that’s you Jocko


    March 14, 2010 at 7:06 pm

  74. Oh look Jocko don’t want to play no more
    poor Jocko
    and besides Tothian is my bitch


    March 17, 2010 at 3:59 pm

  75. jockos still here gay bobby. make your move bitch

    jocko jackamone

    March 18, 2010 at 9:13 am

  76. I already made two, keep up Jocko
    it would seem Tothian is going bye bye anyway after
    finally going full batshit and threatening Superhero
    so who is who’s bitch now Jocko?


    March 24, 2010 at 7:01 pm

  77. You know what, I think you’re Tothian Jocko.
    I think you Tothian and you’re just on here defending your self as Jocko cause you know you’re a little pansy
    who has to threaten people with getting them fired
    or has to latch on to that drunk bastard Frank just so you can feel good about your worthless life at home with your mommy


    March 27, 2010 at 12:15 am

  78. you shut up bobby and stop running down Tohian. He is an american hero. He is a great man. do you think its easy for him to be Eclipticos sidekick?

    jocko jackamone

    March 29, 2010 at 8:46 am

  79. Ecliptico HA! now that was a good one I’ll give you that Jocko, you know you love Tothian so much why don;t you sign up over at therlsh.net ? you can talk to him all the time since he’s always fucken there instead of doing any fucken crime fighting or whatever it is he claims to do


    March 30, 2010 at 10:29 pm

  80. Jocko will not let you run down a great american like tothian.

    jocko jackakmone

    June 9, 2010 at 2:37 pm

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