Ration Reality

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Archive for the ‘entertainment’ Category

12 Rock-themed Films that don’t suck

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Rock’n'Roll Movies That Don’t Suck!

* Hard Core Logo (1996) This poignant Canadian adaptation of Michael Turner’s novel follows a legendary (fictitious) Vancouver band on a reunion tour that involves, among other things: faking a benefit concert for someone who’s not dead, the schizophrenic bassists involuntary mid-tour lithium holiday and, uh, I think Joey Ramone is in there, too somewhere.

* Metal: A Headbanger’s Journey: Filmmaker/academic Sam Nunn combines his two loves in life (metal music and anthropology) in this documentary which views the evolution of heavy music from a cultural standpoint, featuring deluded groupies, appalling album art and Nordic black metal fans who might possibly be taking themselves a bit too seriously.

*Pink Floyd’s The Wall (1982) Yeah, sure; The Wall is more overwrought than any other film listed here. Is it melodramatic? Ohhh, yes! Pretentious? You bet your sweet ass! Still, in what other film could you see a scene like this: Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Soylent Ape

May 27, 2008 at 10:57 am

Word of the Week: Odious

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Homosexuality. Obesity. Online Dating. A hairy guy with a gold chain and weird red patches inside his thighs.  Nothing wrong with any of those things. Yet when you put them together, the result is…. odious.  

nice farmer's tan

GayChubbyDating.com. Go there. Refresh the page a few times to cycle the images.
Masturbate and/or vomit, as nessesary.

Previous !Word!s: MondegreenBlepharoplastyCordycepsJenkem - CILF - Fursecution  

Written by The Bagel of Everything

May 23, 2008 at 5:42 pm

Fernando Botero, Painter of Retards

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An artist is attracted to certain kinds of form without knowing why. You adopt a position intuitively; only later do you attempt to rationalize or even justify it. – Fernando Botero, 1932-20??

Fernando Botero Angulo is totally famous — so famous, in fact, he calls himself “the most Colombian of Colombian artists”. He’s so proud of his Colombian heritage, he dropped his last name and moved to France! In 2005, he gained public recognition by exploiting the Abu Ghraib slumberparty.  I love his art in a way that makes me a bad person.

He paints stocky people with large foreheads (aka fivehead), beady eyes, and blank expressions.  Now, I’m not saying he’s obsessed with Down’s Syndrome. I’m just strongly suggesting it. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by The Bagel of Everything

May 19, 2008 at 1:43 am

Band of the Month: The Chubby Chasers

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ЯR   January’s Official Band: The Chubby Chasers   ЯR 

 

Hip-hop has always embraced a culture of fatness. A big, bassy rhythm is a “fat beat”. A cool stereo or article of clothing might be called “phat”. And those ridiculously fat gold ropes Erik B and Rakim wore back in the day? They were phat, too. Look at the legendary hip-hop artists, from the Fat Boys to Biz Markie to Notorious B-I-G, whose body types were just another part of their artistic personae. It should come as no surprise, then, that a rap act would come along to celebrate the females with a little more to love! (Nearly 2/3 of Americans, including yours truly, are overweight– a clear majority. It’s about time the popular culture–if sometimes begrudgingly– accepts this.) Enter the RationReality Band of the Month: The Chubby Chasers. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Soylent Ape

January 8, 2008 at 12:56 pm

Nothing is sacred…nothing save Bowie

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Turn and face the strange
Deviant wrote this for us, because he’s such a wonderful person
(but he’s  got problems)

In the year 1972, David Jones revealed Himself as David Bowie AKA Ziggy Stardust, the leper messiah from another planet. This was before the internet, so you can imagine that it was a very big deal. People back then were ignorant, and so it was widely believed that David Bowie was indeed a space alien, especially since He looked like this:


Where is your God now?

David Bowie single-handedly invented homosexuality in the early 70′s with His glam-era albums Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders from Mars, Aladdin Sane and Diamond Dogs. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by The Bagel of Everything

December 19, 2007 at 12:02 pm

Depp vs Hasselhoff

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 Saturday, I made a last.fm account (go be my friend, loser). I’m not sure what I think about it yet, except that it showed me this:

Pantera’s Fucking Hostile – An asspie’s interpretation
A broken pikachu, Heir Fritz, the outer toe! Read the rest of this entry »

Written by The Bagel of Everything

December 17, 2007 at 11:28 am

Band of the month: Bear Force 1

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ЯR   December’s Official Band: Bear Force 1   ЯR


BF1: Not your grandfather’s flaming, hairy, middle-aged, Euro-boy Band

BearForce 1 is taking the “boy” out of “Boy Band”. Comprised of 4 gay men with a penchant for pastel polos and Eurodance rhythms, BF-1 have been making waves in the gay community in recent months. Sporting beards and a few extra pounds, BearForce combines smoking hot vocals and synchronized moves with beats that will jump-start any dance floor. They are making their presence known on the net with their first promotional video having “gone viral” (no pun intended) on the Youtubes and boasting over a million hits to date. Furthermore, they lay claim to the title of “World’s First Bear Band”. Note that I didn’t say “Hair Bear Band. That would look something like this: Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Soylent Ape

December 12, 2007 at 4:27 am

Move Ziggy’s for Great Justice

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ROOTS – ROCK – REGGAE

 Sunday, November 25 witnessed the last concert event held at Winston-Salem, NC’s legendary venue, Ziggy’s. Christened “The Last Supper”, the club’s last show fittingly featured crusty Georgia jam band Perpetual Groove (a group that have played Ziggy’s dozens of times). It was a bittersweet sendoff to an establishment full of memories. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Soylent Ape

November 26, 2007 at 10:48 am

The Writer’s Strike: An insider’s view

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In case you haven’t been watching the late-night rerurns for the last week, we’re in the middle of a TV writer’s strike. It’s come to my attention that many are not entirely clear on what the issue(s) is/are in this strike. This isn’t surprising; the last time the Guild that represents TV/Film writers struck was nearly 20 years ago. Also, there are a lot of misconceptions surrounding both sides. For instance many people believe that professional screenwriters make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year. Truthfully, there are a few in that league, but they’ve usually been at it for decades and have a few Seinfelds and X-Files-es under their belts. They’re the rainmakers, the hit-doctors. Most writers make within the range of what a plumber or mechanic might make, except their employment situations are far more transient and far less secure. When you factor in the necessity of living in 2 of the most expensive areas of the country (New York and Los Angeles), it can be pretty challenging to keep food on the table in such a profession. Similarly, we think of producers as being fat cats in $3,000 suits who rule their productions with iron, well-manicured fists. In reality, they are often significantly beholden to other interests: networks, sponsors and investors, who all exact their pound of flesh and sap a little more control away from the prod’s.

Royalties, residuals, format convergence…does anyone outside a 818 or 212 area code know what these are? In a Ration Reality Exclusive, a Hollywood professional involved with a major network production has graciously taken a minute to explain the situation for our readers with the insight only a true insider can have. He has asked that his name be withheld. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Soylent Ape

November 16, 2007 at 3:21 am

RIP-IA: Jeanne Tripplehorn

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Rest in Peace

(in advance)

Jeanne Tripplehorn

Jeanne Tripplehorn

1963 – 20??

As I am writing this, the ever lovely Jeanne Tripplehorn, that hot naked chick from Waterworld and Basic Instinct, has not died.  To the best of my knowledge, she isn’t ill or injured. However, we beings of this mortal coil will each have our last day. 

One of my greatest fears, the elephant on my chest when I’m trying to sleep, is that she will pass on a day when I’m simply too busy, stoned, or sleepy to write a proper sendoff for such a kind, generous, well-endowed lady. So, Jeanne, I’m writing this in advance of your eventual passing. May it be many years from now. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by The Bagel of Everything

November 4, 2007 at 3:15 am

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